Tuesday, July 21, 2009

1 year ago today...

is when our lives began to change. It was this day last year that Tony rushed me to the hospital. I was 23 weeks pregnant and my water had just broke.

The first 24 hours in the hospital were a nightmare. Once they confirmed my water had in fact ruptured I was given my first of two steroid shots. This is given to help the baby's lungs speed up the development process in case a delivery is in the near future. This shot was given at about midnight....and let me tell you...if there would have been a baseball bat in that room that poor nurse would have been missing her head. Those things are given in the hip and it isn't pleasant! At this point we were still in the ONLY room that was available...which wasn't what I would have called a room..more like a closet. NO KIDDING...and I had to share the bathroom with someone on the other side of the wall. OH JOY!

The next morning, still in the closet, we were consulted by the high risk doctor and a neonatologist from All Children's. This was when the nightmare peaked. First I was told there was a VERY high possibility baby (she didn't have a new yet...heck, we hadn't even prepared the nursery or got a crib....my shower was still over a month away!) would come in the next week but if she did stay in the chances she would continue to stay in got greater....HUH? On top of worrying if she was going to come...I no longer had amniotic fluid which meant infection was another BIG concern. Being that I was only 23 weeks along I was also informed that baby was not considered viable so All Children's probably would not come over to help stabilize and transport....HUH? YEAH...a lot to take in.....HOLD ON IT GETS BETTER! Then the neonatologist began to give us the facts...if baby is born before 28 weeks she most likely will have cerebral palsy, be blind and be deaf....HUH? I was then asked how aggressive we wanted them to be when it came to stabilizing her...HUH...WHAT? Were they asking me how hard I wanted them to try to save her...YES!! Thinking back, I don't know how the stress didn't put me into labor on the spot??!!

The day got better when we were moved into an antepartum room...one with my own bathroom...which at this point I was put on STRICT bed rest and had lost my privilege of peeing and showering in a normal fashion...so I could have given a hoot about the bath. The room also had another bed which came in handy the next 2 weeks for the LUCKY person that got to be my servant...I mean bunk mate! This was either my mom or Tony. Night two came along and I got my second round of steroids...this time I didn't feel a thing...which was a nice way to end the day from HELL!

The next two weeks were full of MANY visitors....I was never alone...not even to sleep...which I so much appreciated. My fear was that something would "happen" and I would be alone so the company was always appreciated! I was sent flowers and cards. People made and sent cookies. I was given REAL food not hospital food...life seemed to be pretty good. My mom "showered" me every 2 days. God bless her she even shaved my legs and washed my hair with the shampoo that the astronauts use...no water needed!!! Oh the simple things in life! It was during this time that I realized that Tony really truly loved me...I knew it before but I totally took it for granted. He would see me everyday in all my GLORY and still looked at me the same. FYI...my GLORY was pretty bad...you can only do so much with yourself when you are on your back, someone else is washing you and shaving your legs and all you have to primp your hair is a comb!

During the 2 weeks everyone, especially my dad, kept insisting that we decide on a name. There was one....the first girl name we thought of and we both actually liked....but there was ONE problem...it started with a "T". We swore we'd never be that family...which for the record there is nothing wrong with "that" family we just didn't want to be the Ts...it was bad enough we were already Tony & Tiffany! I kept telling everyone I wanted to see her first. When that stopped working I started to tell them that if we give her a name she will think it is time to come...and sure enough she did...2 days later!

Up until August 3rd I thought I could live like this for months. I mean, I wasn't due until November 10th! I was in no pain and for the most part pretty comfortable. I can't speak highly enough for the nurses that cared for me. In fact I became friends outside of the hospital with a few. I was in a large room with a bed for whomever felt up for the challenge of caring for me...which was not easy! I didn't want to keep bothering the nurses so my bunk mate often became my very own in-room private nurse...who couldn't live like that???

On August 3rd I woke up feeling a little different than I had the days before. My belly was tight and there was a lot of pressure. I told Tony I felt like Tessa was going to come today. As I waited for someone to examine me Tony called my mom. The next thing I know it is around 9:30am and I was on the phone with Dr. Biss. She told me she was on her way in and that Tessa would be born in the next hour. The Anesthesiologist came in, the nurses began to prep me for surgery and I was wheeled into the operating room. I was so nervous. Though Tessa was now viable (25 weeks) we still weren't sure how stable she would be. I can recall Dr. Biss explaining everything that was going to happen....it was so surreal...just like a dream. The spinal didn't take and it was on to plan B. The last thing I remember is looking to my right and seeing All Children's Transport Team filling the room....then I fell asleep. Tessa was born at 10:59am...1pound 15ounces, 13.5 inches long.

I woke to everyone telling me how TINY Tessa was. The family had been waiting by the elevator that the transport team would use to take Tessa to the NICU. They got to see her and they said aside from being so small she looked perfect. I was so weak from bed rest and surgery that it wasn't able to see her right away. To be honest I don't even remember the first time Tony wheeled me over to see her...it was all still a blur. The next 3 1/2 months were nothing short of a roller coaster ride...I'll save that post for August 3rd!


  1. You both have been through so much and now you have the most beautiful and sweetest little girl! I praise the Lord for keeping His hand on her and sending so many wonderful people to help you. Thank you Tiffany for the risks you took to bring her into this world and Tony thank you for all you have been through. I know the Lord has a special purpose for her life. I love you all. Mom (grannie annie)

  2. I've heard mothers talk about their time in the hospital and the process of giving birth...most of them say they hardly remember the pain or their time in the hospital. I think those of us who have experienced premature babies will never forget our time in the hospital or the pain we went though (physical and/or mental). However, we do get to hold a living, breathing miracle everyday and we get to thank God for such a precious gift!!